bleugh!

esplanade concert.

Sunday, July 30, 2006 11:20 PM

=)
first and foremost,i want to say a BIG THANKYOU and give a KISS to ALL the ahbanders for...
E V E R Y T H I N G.
from last year till now,ahband has been a constant blessing to me.
all the hours i spent inside,whether happy or not,will always be etched in my mind,and every single tear i shed for ahband will be remembered.
compared to my love for ahband,the tears were NOTHING.
i will miss all of you...
although i cant name all the names here,i shall name those who were especially dear to my heart..
lets elave it till later cos i typed some names out and i find it kinda lame

esplanade concert..hmmm.
prevvy day,had prac,and some problems cropped up i guess..
then we wanted to go get sth for mrs chua but me steff laoda and elaine couldnt find anything at tm...
so laoda and steff went to marine parade,and left me and elaine.
she wanted to get sth for jonathan cos he getting flowers for them...
by then my happy mood's worn off and i was down again...
i couldn act anymore...
i was sad..
leaving ahband..
how to let go?
sigh so sorry elaine for...pulling a face(though you thought its just cos i wasnt smiling(=)
then went home...slept till eight...
dinner alone,more com...
till 12 plus...
i couldnt sleep..
how to?
esplanade concert was,by then, less than 24 hours away.
i wasnt excited.
how come?
i dont know.
well i got into bed..tried to sleep...
couldnt.
kept thinking about the concert.
got sad.
tried to sleep.
finally i drifted off into lalaland at 2-3plus?
woke up at 5;30 -.-
cos my &^%^%&$ brother said he would drive me to school at SIX cos he wanted to pick up his own friends for work.
lol.
and i was gonna meet brudder at 85 for brekky at 6.45??
ha.
so woke up showered and prepared my stuff...
still quite moody then.
then my brudder haven wake up.
and i didnt bother waking him up so early,in hopes that he might wake up late and drive me straight to 85 nearer to 6.45...
imagine reaching there at 6.10 and wait hlf an hour for laoda!
so prepared and prepared and finally at 6.10 i woke my brudder up=)
HAHA.
then waited for him to dress up(he took longer than i did!) and left...
reached 85..waited for brudder...
oh,LIMCHOONCHENG WAS LATE!!!!first time in history she was late for a date with me=)
haha.
had brekky lor.
we knew lamlam got provide brekky for us...but...me and brudder,,,have huge appetites and stomachs...
so we ate some more..ha.
then yuemu messaged both of us to call steffi whos FOREVER LATE to wake her up at 7..
haha.
which we did..
lol.
ha then went up,saw lotsa banders..
first time most of them were punctual eh.
ha.
then slacked around...
watched(rather than helped) the guys move the perc instruments..haha.
got on the bus...haha.
kinda funny,everyone hung their blazers up,so like got curtains...
aloysius(the dm) tried speaking to us,but failed cos of the curtains.
ha.
then we kept foolin around in the bus la...
crapped with everbody.
and cherine kept taunting me about how she had prata the prevvy day.
idiot.
reached esplanade at 9:30...
haha.one hour behind schedule alrdy.
then got on the lift...WHOA LA.
CAN FIT ELEPHANTS INSIDE YOU KNOW.
haha so we tried to all squeeze inside--typical of us ahbanders...we like to be intimate.
ha but failed cos really not enough space.
then weisian came in but then it was alrdy too full,so the left went ''deh..deh''...
then mervin laughed at weisian lol.
SO BAD.
so we said actually it was mervin who should get out cos he's the real cause la.
haha.
AND I STILL BELIEVE ITS TRUE.
so we went into our rooms.
we were so amused by our room.
got those dressing tables like for real celebrities..
ha.
yujie was the most amused la.kept switching on the lightbulbs..will try to post some pics.
then we split into our sections and lamed ard.
visited our very own toilet..
ITS PURPLE..HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.
and got showers too!(without locks)
ha.its a unisex toilet too!
and the perc section got crazy and kept taking pics inside the toilet.
haha..and i kept going toilet cos it was purple.then jiahua kept complaining.
so after that we went for a briefing in the hall...
we came from backstage so we were like WOW.
cos the view was...really amazing.
ha after briefing was the technical rehearsal...
very funny la.the switching lights on and off.
cos the lightings ppl very very lag.
ha.
ha.but by then i wasnt feeling good cos i had serious migraine...
since last night actually.
but i didnt tell anyone.
didnt want em to worry
it hurt like shit la.
so when we were queuing up for the finale,i had to squat down..
and i cried abit..it was so painful........but nobody saw=)
so went in..sang...lalalala..
then after that went to the artist's lounge for lunch at 11:40..(40 minutes behind schedule)
throughout the finale i kept looking out for someone..
it was only when you were leaving did i see you.
i wanted to say sth.
but yeh,i lacked the courage.
so my mood only got worse.
after lunch had to prepare for the full dress rehearsal..
i was sad,cos i wanted you to watch the performance.
and you couldnt.
while playing,my head really,really nearly exploded.
it was SO FREAKIN PAINFUL.
after that went back...and had to change alrdy!
=(
so we changed in tuning order.haha.we're so organized arent we?
haha..that time i recovered abit alrdy...cos laoda was abit moody or sth,so i msut be high for her.
no matter that my head was exploding.
then played abit..
AND THEN WE GOT INTRODUCED TO OUR MAKE-UP ARTISTS.
i freaked out.
i thot it was a joke that we must put on make up.
but sigh in the end i had to put some on.
but the make up artists were very sweet and nice
kept talking to us nicely...
asked me not to frown so much -.-
then headed to the other makeup artist and she was less friendly than the first,so i was kinda scared..
but turned out she was nice too...
and when she finished she actually said ,''there,you look so pretty now!'
HA WUT A JOKE.
then i noticed yujie kept smiling at my face.
(must be the make-up)
and we tied our ties=)
leopard!WOOHOO.furry again.
see,band ppl are so original and creative.
then took a few family photos...
i looked horrid in everyone of them!
sigh.

then nothing much after that i guess...
only the finale again.
looked for you again.
then after that went bac to slack.
eh actually i cant rmb the seires of events alrdy.
only that our discipline was really worse than SHIT.
sigh.
and dunnohow,weitheng actually became my father -.-
and then,the real thing.
we got so nervous..
nearing 7,me and jiahua weisiong jeryl went up to our room...
got in the lift,we were told not to play our insruments..
so we blasted the mo the lift doors closed!
HAHA.when it opened again we saw yueyang's face and freaked out.
ha.
he didnt hear us blasting in the lift.
so we went up drink water and then finally,headed back down.
wished everyone all the best,and went out.
the cheering was deafening...
kinda pleasing.. =)
the playing...
no comments.
but i guess the ending was high and the aud got high with us..
left...
and then...
some of us disappeared...
hid at the stairs.
sigh.
ive never seen you like that.
but i understand why.
we all let them down la.
not jsut you.
anyways its over.
i didnt cry at first.
i didnt even hit the walls like you guys did.
i couldnt.
the anger,the frustrations were all trapped inside.
it was only when we finally reappeared in the room that i broke down..
after reading jingyi's message again.
all the faith you had in us.
and we threw it out the window.
it was horrid.
totally embarassing.
to break down in the large crowd of band ppl who were also all very high and happy at the moment.
i jsut stood there head bent using the chair as support and crying.
did i shock anyone?cos im sorry if i did.
i started crying when elaine asked if i was ok again..
i guess i do so cos of the sense of security i get from you?
its like,i dunno.i feel safe when im with you so its like,i see you and id just cry.
so you consoled me again.
and led me outside.
im sorry,i tried to speak when you asked me wut was wrong.
i wanted to tell you.
but how?
i couldnt understand why i just cried like that.
mrs lam saw.i know she did.
so many ppl did.
i feel so weak and vulnerable and pathetic.
i went back to the room cos i heard ppl...i guess the choir ppl were coming out,i heard lamlam..
so i must rush back before you saw me..
im sorry to all you for having to see this side of me.
for spoiling the whole damn ambience.
for having to make you guys so quiet around me.
i noticed all the glances you guys gave me.
wwut could i do
i heard all you taking pics.
i wanted to,too.
but how with a face like that.
thanks all for caring...
thank you jeryl sis,for that pat on the shoulder and asking me if i was ok.
im sorry i shunned you,cos i couldnt reply.
and itd be embarassing for you if i suddenly just cried all over you right.lol.
then line up for finale..
i tried to cheer up..
i know i must.
saw the choir performing...they were so good.
so proud of you,cos im sure you sang well.
then we went up to sing.
haha i laughed aabit cos we were swaying so horribly.
like not tgt.
haha.
and i didnt know the lyrics for the chinese one so i lala-ed away.
hahahaha..
then we did the kallang wave!at first it was luan and not v nice,but after a few tries im sure we did it=)
then we had to go backstage to wait in the dark dark corridor for the aud to leave,and meanwhile the banders just started singing phantom and jungle fantasy,then the school song(which i didnt sing cos i didnt know the lyrics) and happy birthday!
THEN WE CHEERED.and sang the ahband cheer...
we really rocked the durian..
then came out finally for the photoshoot..
i was feeling better alrdy=)
more kallang waves...
this time it was very successful...all of them.
the harmonica ppl were getting influenced by our high-ness and did it with us!
so nice!
then choir attempted the same thing..but failed twice before doing a pretty lopsided one...haha.
nice try.
then had to go back and pack up...
then they called us down again..we asked for wut,they said more photos...then end up its to move the perc instruments.
i helped!by carrying the huge furry stick for the base drum.
very heavy okay.
and i played the tick tock thingy.
hhaha...
i was trying my best to be happy=)
then went back up...clear up...
first thing we did--TEAR OFF THOSE STOCKINGS.
jiahua damn obscene.did it in the toilet.the UNISEX toilet.
at least i was better.did it in the shower.
then changed to jeans and then came out.
and qiqin called me..and gave me the most beautiful bouquet of roses...
and told me you gave it to me.
did you know how i felt?
i didnt really know.
but i ran out to look for you.i kept searching.to no avail.
and so i got sad.
i wanted to cry out loud.
but i had no more voice left after all the cheering.
i continued to look for you for the rest of the night....all the way up the bus.
thank you so much.

and then..reached school...said our goodbyes...
first time since syf i hug so many ppl=)
vanessa sockling yingsi qiqin manda elaine jiahua laoda...all of you took advantage of me ah.
mengjit my son,didnt get to hug you. =(
AND I EVEN HUGGED MRS LAM.
she said she'd miss us..awww..
and qiqin,i know your sad,your tears.....
we all are.and we'd come abck and get together sometimes no?
for family gathering and band reunions...
then we got hungry and lamlam brought us to simpung AND TREATED US TO PRATA.
CHERINE ARE YOU READING THIS??????
haha...
thanks to jingyi for that message..i obeyed you and cheered up for the rest of the night=)
then got sent home by manda's very funny dad..he joined us for the supper.haha.
thanks everyone,again,for this memorable night.
i love ahband,from the bottom of my heart.

=)

JAX ......out